AT THE SHOE SHOP
 

A man went to a shoe shop to buy some shoes. He tried on many pairs. Finally, he was satisfied.

"At last," he said, "I have found a pair of shoes that fit me."

"I am not surprised," replied the tired salesman "They're your own shoes."

A MEAN SCOT

People from Scotland are well-known for being mean with their money.

A Scottish man went on holiday to a ski resort.

He said to a ski instructor, "I want to learn to ski. I want to ski using one leg only."

"Why only one leg, sir?"

"Because I will only need one ski. It will be cheaper for me than hiring two."

NO MORE ALCOHOL!

A man believed alcohol was very dangerous. So he invited people to listen to his reasons. At the end of his talk he said, "Now you understand how dangerous alcohol is. Let's all throw our alcohol into the sea."

There was silence. Then one man applauded loudly.

"You agree with me?" asked the speaker.

"Of course. I'm a beachcomber. I collect everything that comes from the sea."

IMPOLITE BOY

A woman visited a family. At the end of her visit, she gave a small coin to the little boy whose family she'd been visiting. He put the coin in his pocket without thanking her.

His mother, thinking perhaps he was shy, asked, "What do you say?"

"I don't know."

"Yes you do. What do I say when your father gives me money?"

"I say 'Is that all?'"

A DOCTOR'S VISIT

A doctor visited a patient who was a married woman. After the examination, he said to her husband outside the room, "I don't like your wife's appearance."

"I don't like it either," replied the husband. "But she has a lot of money."